Topher Payne dons Julia Sugarbaker’s class and sass

The Process Theatre Company is bringing back Designing Women Live for the seventh time for one weekend only. Coming this weekend, Topher Payne takes on the role as Julia Sugarbaker at the Academy Theatre in Avondale Estates. Below, he talks about why this sitcom put to stage still holds up, why Julia is the better Sugarbaker sister, and mastering Julia’s drawl.

Q. The Process Theatre Company is finally bringing back Designing Women Live. You are reprising your role as Julia, what is your favorite part about playing this outspoken elegant lady?

A. The way Julia presents herself to the world – perfectly tailored suits, flawlessly manicured, not a hair out of place, her elegance – it’s the antithesis of everything I am. I’d be best described as “casual,” or “a befuddled wreck.” So accessing that Sugarbaker poise is like putting on a suit of armor. Under what other circumstances will I ever be the smartest, classiest person in the room?

Q. The characters are for obvious reasons usually played by women, but The Process Theater Company has turned that idea on its head and filled those roles with men. How does this change the show? And how does the audience react?

A. I think the joy, both for the performers and for the audience, lies in the challenge of seeing how closely we can honor the original series. If I, as a six-foot, two hundred-pound man, can make you believe for a few moments that I’m Dixie Carter, that’s a pretty extraordinary bit of theater magic, you know? Our belief is always that the fact of four men playing the roles is inherently funny – we never wink at it or comment on it, we just focus on selling the script. And the scripts are actually really well-written. The jokes still play, which is amazing for a twenty-five year-old sitcom.

Q. Drag seems to fit your character’s sister, Suzanne, a bit more than Julia. Do you ever wish you could step into the outwardly flashier sister’s shoes?

A. What, are you kidding me? I don’t care how many one-liners or pretty outfits Suzanne gets- I get the Terminator tirades. I’ve had the chance to do “The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia” speech in front of an audience at least twenty times. I totally win.

Q. These characters are so iconic, were there attributes that you knew that you just had to keep and those that you felt you could toy with when it came to Julia?

A. Dixie Carter had an extraordinarily unique way of speaking, with all of these odd breaths in unexpected places. She had this breathy, honeyed Southern drawl with a ton of vocal power, and she’d randomly draaaaaaw out a certain words. So I still work my ass off trying to perfect the voice – it’s like learning a piece of music.

Also, Dixie Carter was really proud of her damn legs. Watch her. She knew what she was working with. I grab on to that. And I’m so lucky, because the creator of the original series sent me those gigantic eyeglasses Dixie Carter wore on the show, so I’ve got that little bit of the real Julia with me onstage.

Q. For those who have never experienced this show, what are audiences in for?

A. The first act is an episode presented word-for-word, exactly as it was on television. In the second act, I script a mashup featuring the plotlines from two different episodes, so it’s a bit of familiar combined with a bit of the new. They’re in for a lot of fun and a lot of nostalgia.

Also, they’ll see a lot of regrettable late 80s hair and fashion choices. Giant sweaters paired with leggings! Jumpers! Shoulder pads! It’s all very impressive.

Now, let’s play a little Actor’s Studio. Pretend you are hearing these questions in a monotone male voice:
1. What is your favorite word? More
2. What is your least favorite word? Deadline
3. What turns you on? If you can make me think and laugh at the same time, I’m pretty easy.
4. What turns you off? A sloppy drunk
5. What sound or noise do you love? The variety of sounds my beagle makes when she’s sleeping.
6. What sound or noise do you hate? The sound of my own name when everybody needs something.
7. What is your favorite curse word? Cocksucker
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? I’d be a teacher. And I think I’d be a good one.
9. What profession would you not like to do? Grant writing for non-profits. I would rather clean toilets than write grants for non-profits.
10. If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates? “I hope you brought your scripts. You’re going to love the casting pool we’ve got up here.”